Week 5/7-5/13: Creativity and the Ideal Conflict Manager: Part 2

Summarize what you liked most and what you liked least about this class. In other words, what were the strengths and weaknesses of this class? Would you recommend this class to other students? Why or why not? I have taken more online classes at San Jose State than I have in-person classes, and I absolutely loved how the blog assignments and responses were all due by the end of the week but 12 hours apart. I have a class where the assignments and responses BOTH had to be 24 hours apart and this was difficult to manage when other projects and papers were also due. I liked the option to be able to do the conflict project either all alone or as a group. I work full-time and take 11 units each semester, so flexibility is needed. Often a professor assigns a project for a group, and only 1/3 or ½ of the group participates. I enjoyed how responsive and available the professor was. The idea to be available in IM is genius!! I disliked was how much lead time was given for projects. I am a person that likes to get a SUPER head start knowing the middle and end of the semester get crammed with assignments, quizzes, projects, and papers. I also liked least that this class did not have a final study guide since it is a cumulative test. I have found that cumulative tests are difficult to study for since it is 16 weeks of material. Not knowing which answers were wrong on tests was also hard for me. I never know which terms, concepts, etc., are wrong so statistically it is expected that I will also get those answers wrong on the final questions. I would highly recommend this class to another student. In fact, a coworker of mine was admitted into SJSU for the Fall 2012 semester and I have requested she take this class!! It is easy to manage, the professor is responsive, understanding, and knows how to teach remotely.

Week 5/7-5/13: Creativity and the Ideal Conflict Manager: Part 1

After reading Chapter 16, it is apparent that people have such negative views of conflict because many people do not know how to manage it effectively or efficiently. While this is taking place a conflict may be filled with heightened emotions, avoidance, silence, and may be leading to violence or a terminated relationship. All of these previously mentioned factors are usually seen as negative, so people often assume all conflict is correlated with negative emotions, thoughts, and actions. As more people become more educated on the subject of conflict, its numerous forms, and the ways in properly managing it- conflict is feared much less. We fear the unknown and if the mass population does not choose to enroll in a conflict or communication type class, they will always fear conflict. It is a shame we do not incorporate communication studies more frequently in our school systems since it is an imperative part of our family, professional, and other parts of our lives.

Week 4/9-4/15: Managing Conflict from a Theoretical Perspective: Part 3

The concept for this week I choose is the psychodynamic theory. This theory explains due to people’s intrapersonal issues they experience conflict. Those issues are defines as emotional, mental, and psychological, and those persons lash out at the wrong people or for the wrong initial issue.

Today, a co-worker and I were talking about women, and how we become physically, and mentally morphed when we are on our monthly cycle. All of the women reading this know this is true, and all of you men are shaking your heads in agreement when I say, “We are different animals during this time.” However, with enough years that have gone by, I have been able to manage my mood swings, and lashings on the unexpected neighbor or boyfriend. I know when to expect the morphing stage, and better prepare for an emotional breakdown. Moreover, when times are stressful the psychodynamic theory comes into play, and a small disagreement may arise for the wrong reason and taken out on the wrong person. 

Week 4/9-4/15: Managing Conflict from a Theoretical Perspective: Part 2

Everyone at least once in their life has made false attributions and I guarantee it escalated the issue. As the attribution theory states, “People act as they do in conflict situations because of the inferences they make about others based on their behavior (Abigail & Cahn, 2011),” and I agreed with this theory.
A false attribution I made once was when I was arguing with an ex-boyfriend. I made many internal attributions about him, and I assumed the problems were all due to his actions. We would argue and bicker. We would get into these arguments because we were both unhappy. I deep down knew he was cheating on me, so I’d call him names. Now I realize, I was a young, and VERY naive girl would did not have the confidence and life experience to simply leave due to my unhappiness. I placed the blame all on him, and this escalated to arguments and later me resolving the situation by leaving.

I surprise myself when I make the accurate attributions about an acquaintance that I did not friend. My personality does not allow me to make many acquaintances, but I make serious life-long friendships. I met a girl once, when I was in High School, and made an accurate attribution about her. It turned out to be a great decision since she ended up getting into trouble, and would have influenced me in a bad way.

Week 4/9-4/15: Managing Conflict from a Theoretical Perspective: Part 1

When searching online for the word forgiveness it produced the definition, many websites about the bible, and the scientific understanding of the psychology of forgiving. I can really understand why the term religion was a topic when I typed in this word. The bible and God is often referred to as being forgiving, and many people turn to this thought to be forgiven. I am not really sure of why the psychology of forgiving would be a popular topic, maybe, when someone has lost a loved one due to a hurtful act it takes a scientific approach to understand others actions.

When searching online for the word reconciliation it produced many more definitions than forgiveness, again, the topic of religion, political and banking. Religion came up because of the Catholic Sacrament of Reconciliation. This is the most popular religion in the United States; so many people tend to look this phrase up. Numerous people reconcile their debts into one lump, thus the reason of banking to come up. Divorce is also another word because many couples like to reconcile before the head for that direction.

When searching online for the word revenge produced television series, and movies named, “Revenge”. Often the word triggered games, company names, and more movies. This is due to people being more interested in visually watching these types of acts rather than watching something that incorporates bunnies, hugging, and love. The mass population would rather see blood, guts, and simply hear a good story on revenge.

None of the words triggered more websites than another. It seems as though the internet has an infinite amount of pages.

Week 4/2-4/8: Managing Face & Managing Conflict through Forgiveness: Part 3

For spring break I went to a bachelorette party in San Diego. The bride-to-be is a good friend, but I did not know many of the other girls attending the social gathering. Two of the other girls I had met in the past, but were more acquaintances than friends. These girls like to party more than I had ever seen people party in my life. I knew I had experienced a lot of craziness in my life, but this was a 24hour drink fest from the moment our flight landed at 11am on Friday until 1pm Monday afternoon.

Sunday was supposed to be the relaxing day by the pool. However, this was absolutely not the case. We attended a brunch on the water, and the restaurant served bottomless champagne with the fancy buffet. This is exactly what happened with all the girls but me and another girl who had to drive home after brunch. Since we had partied until 5am, I was not feeling very well, so I didn’t join them. It lasted for hours, and was a shit-show. I helped the other girl get to her car. While this was all happening one of the girls “tried” to secretly” ask another if I was mad, and was going to stay that way. It seems to me this situation has caused some emotional residue that I am trying to get past. I felt a sense of betrayal and was a little hurt, but knowing she was drunk, I am feeling a lot less hurt. But emotional residue can be a dangerous thing. Those transgressions can linger and cause a relationship to fail before it can begin.

Week 4/2-4/8: Managing Face & Managing Conflict through Forgiveness: Part 2

I had something very private happen to me about a year and a half ago. Only few friends and minimal family members know about it. I felt it was not necessary for people to know about this event in my life. A few months later I visited some family in Los Banos and I brought my boyfriend to meet them. Some family flew into California from Idaho and was also in Los Banos, so it was a great day to have a meet and greet with Randy. The moment I walked in the door my aunt asked why I did not tell her about my secret. I was caught off guard, completely embarrassed, and angry. I told her the truth, and understood. I asked where she heard this private information, and she stated my sister told her. This was unlike my sister, so this made me even more infuriated. Once I was home, I called and asked her about it. She said she didn’t tell my aunt and that it was my mother. This made more sense knowing her character. I told my mother to keep my information quiet from now on, and I told her how I could no longer trust her. It was harder for me to forgive my mom since I had originally asked her not to tell anyone.